Welcome to Zombie Menace
Yes, Zombies are real. Hollywood has fictionalized and dramatized them; however there are/were real zombies. If you are expecting the walking dead to shuffle down your street anytime soon, you will be sorely disappointed.
A Brief History of Zombies
Real zombies are not "the living dead" but the "mistakenly dead." In the past there were not many people that knew how to verify if a person was dead. As a result, more than one person was buried alive. When the lucky ones recovered enough to scratch and claw their way out of their graves, they were misidentified as either zombies or vampires. This actually led to several strange customs throughout the world such as driving a wooden stake through the heart of the dead before they were buried. There were even people that sold coffins with breathing tubes and bells that could be rang from "down under" to alert people that the occupants were not dead.
In Japan sushi chefs are trained how to serve a particular type of blowfish that is highly toxic. Improperly preparing the fish can "kill" you. In actuality, the fish's toxin slows the body's processes down so much that it is impossible to tell if the person is alive or dead. This led to the custom of the dead being left to lay for three days before burial.
The non-fiction book The Serpent and the Rainbow, and the "adapted" (fiction) movie version shows that Haitian zombies were the result of another form of fish toxin. The Haitian, or Voodoo, zombie was the basis for the Hollywood version of zombies seen in most popular horror movies. This trend started with the first zombie movie, White Zombie, and continues to this day.
But, if the living dead rise in search of brains, you bet your machete that we will be here to tell you all about it!
Future of Zombies
As crazy as it sounds, it is entirely possible for "rage" zombies like those seen in 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later. These were not the typical "walking dead." They are infected living humans with uncontrollable and infectious rage.The folks over at National Geographic recently published an article explaining how this could actually happen. In short, you combine the Rabies and Flu viruses and you have the Rage virus. For more on this see the National Geographic Channel documentary The Truth Behind Zombies.
Do Zombies Poop?
The question was posed, not for the first time, in a Twitter discussion with The Walking Dead executive producer Glen Mazzara. While he dodged the question, it has drawn the attention of many zombie fans. So how about it? Do zombies poop (defecate)? We examin this questions and invite you to discuss all aspects of zombie biology.
So, do zombies poop?
While the question may seem rather esoteric, it is actually a very important plot point for any zombie story that seeks to envision a future beyond a few weeks after an outbreak. While the suspension of disbliefe can carry most zombie fans along way, there is no avoiding the fact that Hollywood zombies defy the laws of physics and biology. So, lets examin the nitty gritty details of the problem.
Consider these facts:
- According to physics, any object, including living organisms, must use energy to overcome inertia. In other words, we need fuel to move.
- Zombies eat. We all agree that these brain obsessed, formerly living versions of ourselves hunt and eat their prey, namely us.
- What goes in, must come out.
So, we are faced with a logical conundrum. If zombies consume brains and flesh, what happens to it? Our plot consultants got together over a few beers, well allot of beers, and came up with the following list of possibilities:
Senerio 1: Zombies are dead and, therefore, do not digest what they consume. Other organisms within the body will consume the food to one degree or another, but the zombie itself derives no sustenance from the food they consume. The food must be eliminated from the body. Assuming there are no gaping holes in digestive tract, they will poop, barf or rupture. The up side of this is that the zombie mussels will consume themselves as fuel for movement and the zombie will stop moving, or "starve."
Senerio 2: Zombies are not dead, they are undead, and can digest what they consume. A scary thought, but a more logical conclusion is that zombies do digest their food and use it as fuel. Since no organism is known to have a 100% mater to energy conversion of food, we must assume that waste accumulates and must be expelled. It would be logical to assume that it would happen in the normal fashion, they poop.
Senerio 3: Zombies are animated corpses, which means the virus. bacteria or other organism that is inhabiting them is actually consuming what the zombie eats. A very interesting alternative to the traditional concept of the zombie, this was an idea sparked by the horror movie Splinter. While an interesting take on the idea, the need to eliminate the waste still remains. It does, however, offer another idea for elimination. The waste could be eliminated like sweat or other forms of excreta.
So, what do you think? Do we need to add soiled trousers to the wardrobe list?